


Five times Jacob Carter knew, and one time he didn't

by sharim28



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-05
Updated: 2018-08-10
Packaged: 2019-06-22 05:13:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15574536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sharim28/pseuds/sharim28
Summary: No, there’s nothing to see really, but Jacob sees it anyway.





	1. Whispered Secrets

**Author's Note:**

> This series is complete, but I'm a bit impatient and posting the first chapter before my beta returns it, so please bear with me!
> 
> au100 prompt 027: Parents

**1\. Whispered Secrets**

 

When a man finds out he’s dying, and that man’s an Airforce General, it means a whole new battle plan is needed. The doctors tell him if he’s lucky he’ll have a few months, so Jacob calls his marker at NASA, sells his house and has his first dose of chemotherapy within a week. Five days later he’s wearing his uniform in DC and making small talk until Hammond arrives.

 

He feels bad that he’s planning on stealing Sam away from Hammond, but he knows whatever she’s doing under a mountain isn’t chasing the stars the way she’s destined. He hopes she’ll understand that this is his way of showing just how proud he is of her. He knows the stars are her future.

 

How do you tell your daughter you have cancer? She’s a grown woman now, strong and beautiful and so like her mother it takes his breath away each time he sees her. How do you tell her you’re going to die? Really, how do you tell her anything, because even though she looks like her mother she’s as stubborn and snappy as her father, and talking was never something they were good at.

 

He’s never been a coward, but this is one of the most terrifying things he’s ever done (one being asking Emily to marry him, and the other being handed his son all pink and squealing wrapped in a blanket, and not having any idea how is life was changing in that instant).

 

She arrives while he’s making small talk with Hammond (who refuses to give even a hint as to what she’s doing), and the stunned look on her face stabs at his resolve. Suddenly there’s a Colonel at her side – Colonel Jack O’Neill, Black Ops, _not_ a scientist, _not_ a paper pusher – and a flicker of concern creeps through his worries and fears about cancer and NASA and cover stories so thin a light breeze could blow them over. Sam’s laughing and trying too hard, and he’s trying to work out why each time he looks at Jack O’Neill he feels as though he’s losing a part of his daughter.

 

It takes him three days to wake up with his heart racing to realise that there was nothing to see which was cause for concern. It’s the unspoken things he heard – something about the note in her voice, something about the tone in his body language. Something about entire conversations that echoed in silence.

 

His heart is still racing and he lies on the bed in the dark, tangled in sheets and his breathing laboured.

 

She wouldn’t. Sam wouldn’t. She’d never fall for her CO.

 

Would she?


	2. Tangent of a look

**2\. Tangent of a look**

 

The light in the Tel’tak is dim, but Jacob’s eyes are better than they have ever been thanks to Selmak – he doesn’t miss much. He sees the way she sits guard near his head, close but not so close that they are touching. Close, so that perhaps her fingers can occasionally brush his hair by accident.

 

He remembers the look on her face when she first told him what was wrong, the snappiness and tension of the journey until they reached the runaway glider. He saw the look on her face when the rings deposited Jack and Teal’c in the cargo hold – the utter _relief_.

 

No, nothing wrong with his eyesight. He can see clear as day what’s happening, even though there’s nothing to see, and he’s not entirely certain how he feels about it all.

 

_O’Neill is a fine man, Jacob. She could do a lot worse._

 

_She would pick the one person she’s not allowed to choose. And he’s so much_ older _than her. He’s not exactly the guy I’d pick for her, he’s got a lot of history you know – I know some of what he-_

_You aren’t the one who gets to choose though, Jacob._

_That’s not the point._

Sometimes he wishes he was alone in his head. Selmak’s amusement is like acid on a wound, so he shoves the Tel’tak into autopilot and stands up, stretching stiff legs and straightening out his back.

 

Sam stirs as he walks into the cargo bay, looking up from where she’s sitting on the floor.

 

“How is he?” he whispers.

 

Despite the shadows from the bulkhead, by the silver starlight he sees her glance down at O’Neill. Sometimes, looking at Sam it’s like seeing Emily all over again – the pull of her lips, the tilt of her head, the openness of her smile. For the briefest pause of a heartbeat, he sees the way Emily used to look at him when she thought he was sleeping. And then it’s Sam again, looking up at him with a tired smile. “He’s fine, Dad. Just sleeping.”

 

No, there’s nothing to see really, but Jacob sees it anyway.


	3. Clarity of Descent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one HAS been beta'd! As a result, all mistakes are mine. Thanks to the wonderful Sel for doing an amazing job as always x

The tang of the salt hangs in the air, and Jacob breathes it in deep. He used to love the taste of salt on the wind and the scrape of the sand against his feet, but now the taste is sour and he wonders if he will ever enjoy the ocean again.

 

Jacob tries hard not to think about those moments where he thought Sam was going to die. Where he _knew_ Sam was going to die.

 

 _She didn’t die_ , Selmak soothes gently.

 

He shoots a surreptitious glance as his daughter, ambling along on the sand beside him, her shoes loosely grasped in her fingers and her eyes faraway.

 

No, Jacob agrees, she didn’t, but no thanks to him.

 

They haven’t spoken about it. About the fact that she almost drowned, and that he is terrified at the thought of her ever setting foot through the Stargate again. He’d held her so tight he thought he’d break her when they were first reunited back on land. The taste of salt on her skin when he kissed her cheek and forehead was like poison, and her soft hair had smelt of brine when he buried his face against her.

 

He’d almost lost her.

 

“What are you thinking, Dad?” She’s watching him now, those eyes as blue as the water beyond her.

 

“Feel like going for a swim?” he deflects, the emotions and words to say anything else seem to stick in his throat like dry bread and fish bones.

 

She snorts, starting to chuckle, and jostles him with her shoulder as they continue walking along. That’s his Sam, with her quick sense of humour and easy smile. He thinks of Mark, his solemn son, and wonders what he’d say if he knew what his sister did for a living and that his dad was now, sort-of, an alien. He starts chuckling himself and catches Sam shooting him a look with a quirked eyebrow and tilt of her head. He’s used to seeing that look, just not on her face.

 

“Think Jack wants to go for a swim?”

 

He sees the walls slam into place; the way in which her easy smile turns careful and her shoulders become stiff as though she’s wearing her dress blues and medals and is on parade for the President.

 

“I doubt it.”

 

They walk in silence, occasionally bumping shoulders, and Jacob eventually feels himself start to relax again, enjoying the sea air and the sound of gulls on the wind while the water laps at the shore. Up ahead he can see the men of SG-1 gathered around a small ice cream cart. By the time Jacob and Sam reach the rest of the team, they’ve conducted their business.

 

Jack wordlessly hands Sam a cone, plain vanilla with no additions. Jacob watches as she smiles at him, a silent acceptance. Jacob receives his cone (looking as though the candy store exploded over it) from Jonas. Teal’c eyes them all warningly, and keeps tight hold on both cones he’s holding. Jacob sighs with contentment.

 

“What?” Jack asks him, starting his ice cream.

 

“I don’t even remember how long it’s been since I went to the beach,” Jacob admits, the sweetness of the icy treat exploding over his taste buds and obliterating the lingering taste of salt from the breeze clinging to his lips.

 

“It’s my first time at the beach,” Jonas announces.

 

“This too is my first time on a Tau’ri coastline for leisure,” Teal’c adds.

 

They settle themselves against the boardwalk as they enjoy their ice creams, each lost in thought as they look out of the water that so nearly claimed them. He’s almost finished his ice cream when he sees Sam tapping her nose, and Jacob’s amused to realise Jack has some ice cream on the tip of his nose.

  
Jacob knows that Sam has a thing for Jack. He’s watched her grow up and knows her tells, and knows that she’ll never do the wrong thing. Jacob didn’t know that Jack has a thing for Sam though, until he reaches over and wipes an imaginary spec of ice cream from Sam’s cheek. A brief, innocent touch with his thumb over her cheekbone and his fingers brushing under her chin. Didn’t know it was real until he saw a man reassuring himself that the woman he loves is still alive and well and whole in front of him.

 

It’s not just a _thing_ , he’s realising. Tomorrow they board a flight and return to the SGC, the Colonel and the Major and the aliens in tow, and this little reprieve on a busy beach with sunshine and ice cream and the adrenaline rush of escaping death again will be over. Jack will be back to being the Colonel who doesn’t have a thing for his Major.

 

The ice cream is gone, the sun is setting, Sam’s back on the sand collecting shells, and the breeze is wrapping its salty fingers around his heart. Suddenly Jacob feels old and tired.

 

_They will be fine, Jacob._

 

He wants to disagree; he knows what they’re up against. He’s quiet as the group silently rises together and starts wandering back to the cars. He wants to linger, to hold the fragile revelation he’s just had up against the sky and examine it carefully, thoroughly, not yet sure how he feels about this. But Mark and the kids are waiting for him and Sam, and now Jack has fallen back to see what’s keeping him.

 

“Jacob?”

 

“You should come to dinner with us, Jack.” The words are out before he realises he’s spoken them.

 

Jack looks at him, the familiar quirk of the eyebrow and tilt of the head. “What’s up?”

 

“You nearly died today. You and Sam. You should come for dinner with us,” he repeats, firm now in his invitation.

 

They’ve fallen behind the group, walking slowly. “Thanks for the invite, Jacob, but it’s a family thing.”

“I know,” Jacob says calmly. “You should be there.”

Jack stops walking, gazing sharply at Jacob, who doesn’t stop entirely but slows enough that he has to turn his head back. “I _know_ , Jack,” he says gently, letting a smile tug at his lips. A knowing smile.

 

“You know what?” Jack catches up with him, now avoiding his gaze.

 

Jacob smiles. “You can just keep on calling me Dad,” he says after a pause. They’re almost at the cars now, the others milling up ahead, waiting for them. “It’s a good opportunity for you to meet Mark and his family.”

 

Again the hesitation, the deliberation in the gaze. It takes longer than Jacob thinks it will; they’re just about in the carpark when Jack speaks. “If you’re sure?”

 

“I’m sure,” Jacob affirms. Then adds, “and I’m pretty certain she is too, so make sure you keep her in one piece on your missions.”

 

He’s surprised to feel Jack’s hand on his arm, slowing him, stopping him. Jack meets his gaze earnestly, a rare openness Jacob’s never seen directed at him before. “Always,” he says, and Jacob has never believed in a word more.

 

The weight of the promise settles over them, and for the first time since the taste of salt and bile curdled in his throat when he thought his daughter was going to die, Jacob feels the burn ease and the peace return.

 

“We’re going to be late, Dad,” Sam calls to him, her voice floating across the air. “Hurry up!”

 

“We’re coming, Sam.”


	4. Herald of Death

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all the lovely comments and feedback. I'm posting part 4 and 5 tonight - the final one is written, just need to tweak and polish before I'm ready to post it. Thanks for following along, and hope you keep enjoying :)

Despite his shower, the antiseptic and the fresh gauze, Jacob can still smell the stench of burnt flesh, the acrid scent of discharged weapons and the underlying metallic tang of blood. It seems to hang in the air around him, permeating through him.

 

He sees Sam in his mind, the way she sprints and darts between cover, the dirt and debris clouding visibility until she disappears, the unwavering form of the Kull warrior steadily hunting her down.

 

“Sam will be fine. Jack and Teal’c will get her,” Daniel says after the silence between them has stretched on.

 

“They just have to get there in time.” Jacob is surprised he voiced his fears, but perhaps he shouldn’t be. Daniel Jackson has a way about him that lets you relax, and you find your innermost thoughts slipping dangerously into the conversation.

 

“They will,” Daniel says with a surety of faith born from many impossible rescues. “Jack and Teal’c won’t let anything happen to her.”

 

Jacob alternates between finding himself annoyed by Daniel (probably almost as much as he’s annoyed by Jack), and impressed by Daniel. Selmak, of course, quite likes Daniel and his intellect. Today, Jacob is grateful Daniel stayed behind.

 

He’s watched Sam and her team for years now, and he’s found himself thankful that she has three good men surrounding her while he’s not there with her.

 

Selmak is getting tired, and Jacob can feel his bones start to ache. This injury will take a long time to fully heal. Jacob and Selmak may share a body and share thoughts, but Jacob’s still very good at not talking about things, and ignoring them until they go away.

 

 _This one isn’t going to go away_ , Selmak remarks quietly, for the first time voicing the knowledge of her mortality. _I’m sorry, Jacob._

_There is nothing to be sorry about, old friend._

 

Thanks to Selmak, Jacob has lived a thousand years in one lifetime, with memories rich and full. He’s had five extra, unimaginable years where he’s gotten to know his children as adults and re-evaluated the priorities in his life. He’s seen sunsets on foreign plants, nebulae across the galaxy, and meteor showers from a moon. The most incredible thing though, is seeing his daughter alive and vibrant, thriving, and happy.

 

He wants to see her like that again.

 

\---

 

There’s a freedom between them that Jacob doesn’t think he’s ever seen before. Jack’s got his arm around her waist while she has hers around his shoulders, clinging to each other as they stagger through the wormhole. They manage several small, stumbling steps before she starts to fall, and he catches her, dragging her unceremoniously against him down the ramp to where the medical team is waiting.

 

Alive. His Sam is alive, and Jack brought her home. Just like he said he would.

 

Jack hovers around her, letting the medics work. When they’re satisfied and start wheeling her to the infirmary, he reaches out and squeezes her shoulder.

 

“You did good, Carter,” Jacob hears him say.

 

Sam smiles up at him, dopey from the drugs, and reaches to grab the hand he’s pulling away, holding it tightly in front of everyone. “Thanks sir. For saving me.”

 

“You saved yourself, Carter. We were just the backup.” Jack stuffs his hands back in his pockets, as though he wants to get the offending limbs out of the way before people start accusing him of being too free with his second, and looks over at Jacob and Hammond waiting up in the control room. “She gets a bit dopey on the good stuff,” he offers, and then disappears through the blast doors they wheeled Sam through.

 

Jacob hobbles down the stairs, his injured leg still weak and painful. He finds them all in the infirmary - Jack, Teal’c, Daniel - crowding around the doorway, waiting for the okay to go in. He eases himself into an uncomfortable plastic chair, taking the weight off his leg and rubbing at it absently.

 

“We should call Pete,” Daniel says eventually.

 

Jacob, Jack, and Teal’c all stare at him, the silence pregnant.

 

“Why?” Jack demands.

 

“Who is Pete?” Jacob asks, pinning Jack beneath his gaze.

 

“Pete Shanahan,” Daniel answers when it’s clear Jack isn’t about to divulge the information. “He’s a police officer Sam’s been seeing for a little while.”

 

“Oh,” Jacob says, shooting another glance at Jack, not sure what he’s missed, but no one offers further insights. Four days he spent with Sam, and not one mention that she was dating someone seriously enough to have introduced her team to him?

 

 _You’re upset because she didn’t tell you she’s seeing someone_ , Selmak’s observation stings.

 

 _I thought she had her sights set on someone else,_ Jacob admits. He hates to get things wrong.

 

Selmak is quiet for a while, but he can feel her thinking. _I think you’re right,_ Selmak says eventually. _We’ve seen them together. We know them. I don’t think it’s anything to worry about._

 

_Weren’t you the one telling me it’s not up to me who Sam chooses?_

 

 _Well yes_ , Selmak is amused, _But it’s still quite evident who she has chosen, regardless of what she may think she’s doing._

 

Jacob smiles to himself, and hopes Selmak is right. He hasn’t met this new guy - this Pete - but he knows his Sam, and he knows what he’s seen, even if there is nothing to see.

 

He looks over at Jack, who’s sitting hunched over on his chair with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands, eyes hidden from sight. He’s not sure he’s ever seen Jack in quite such a defeated posture. Over the hunched form next to him, he meets Teal’c’s eyes, and sees a depth of shared understanding and concern.

 

Yes, he’s watched Sam with her team for years, and these men know her better possibly even than she knows herself. He may not be here forever, but he knows these men would die for her if they had to. She will never be lacking for family.

 

His leg throbs, and he rubs at it again. He sees Jack watching him, a suspicious glint in his eye. He stops worrying at his leg and sits a bit straighter.

 

When they go in to see her later on, he sits by her side and holds her hand after hugging her gently and kissing her cheek. She laughs and smiles with her team, her eyes shadowed by exhaustion and the glassy sheen of pain that still lingers. He watches as, separated by the buffer that is Pete, Sam and Jack exchange more smiles and innocent contacts than he’s ever seen before, and knows that Selmak is right. Sam’s made her choice, she just has to realise that.

 

He doesn’t like to leave her like this, with fear still lurking in her eyes, but she’ll be okay because she has SG-1 and a good man beside her.  When she looks at Jack, Jacob can see the fear leave her eyes for a time, and he knows she’ll be okay. She drifts off to sleep before he can say his goodbyes, so he settles in to wait and give Selmak the time she needs to heal them as much as she can.

 

What, he wonders as he holds Sam’s fingers lightly between his own, what happened to her that she’d chase a dream with someone else, instead of the man who was ready to die for her?


	5. Threads of life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think in the series there's some confusion/debate as to the gender of Selmak. I've always associated a female voice to Selmak thanks to the host we saw her leaving when she first joined with Jacob, and so I've assigned that gender here.

Six years ago, Jacob faced his mortality in a dark, cramped hospital room with an empty chair beside his bed and regrets forefront in his mind.

 

Today, there is still regret - it would be foolish to deny any regret - but multiple other emotions overwhelm the regret, and Jacob finds he is thankful and sad and almost at peace. There is just one pressing concern he needs to resolve before he can truly say he is at peace with the thought of dying.

 

He’s dying. Selmak is gone already, and it’s only a matter of time until Jacob succumbs too.

 

His next visitor is Jack. Jacob sent Sam to go meet the Tok’ra who would farewell Selmak, knowing that Jack would take the reprieve to slip in and see him on his own.

 

“How’re you doing, Dad?” Jack asks, his voice cracking slightly towards the end.

 

“What the hell are you doing, Jack?” Jacob demands weakly, staring him.

 

Jack pulls back, shocked.

 

“You’re letting my daughter marry someone else, and you’re still trying to call me Dad?”

 

“I’m not _letting_ her do anything, Jacob. She’s a grown woman who makes her own choices, and-”

 

“’ _And_ ’ my ass,” Jacob sneers. “I’m a dying man, Jack, I can say what the hell I want now. You’re an idiot. Both of you. You’re passing up something special for the rule book and your honour, but when you’re lying where I’m lying all you’ll be feeling is regret.”

 

Jack’s gaping at him now. “Her career-”

 

“Her career isn’t going to keep her company on cold nights, Jack,” Jacob says bluntly. “Mine didn’t. And I know both of you think I’d disapprove if you broke the rules, or bent the regs, but the fact is I learnt the cold hard truth about loving and losing and how lonely life is when you don’t make the right choices.”

 

Jack considers him. “It’s _her_ choice,” he says quietly, firmly. “I’m not putting her in a position where she has to choose. My career is... Well, even if I wasn’t reaching the end, a scandal like this would never derail my career the way it might hers. If she ever indicated that she wanted to take it out of the room-”

 

“Jack, she’s marrying him because she’s lost faith in the two of you ever happening,” Jacob says impatiently. “I’ve been watching you both for years, and I’m not blind. No one is. You’ve both done the right thing and put yourselves behind your duty and the good fight, but the fight is over, so now you need to start fighting for her or you’re both going to miss out.”

 

The speech, the emotions, the anger and the desperation are exhausting now that Selmak is gone. Jacob pushes aside his own, aching loneliness, and reaches out to grasp Jack’s hand. His fingers have more strength than he thought he could muster, and he’s grateful to feel Jack gripping back.

 

Jack’s a good man. Jacob likes him, enjoys his company and appreciates his frankness. Has valued his respect and friendship over the years.

 

“I want her to be happy, Jack,” Jacob whispers, closing his eyes, feeling the strength seeping from his limbs. “I want _you_ to be happy, too, son.”

 

Jack’s fingers tighten around his. “I’m never not going to love her,” Jack whispers, and Jacob thinks it’s probably the first time Jack has ever said the words out loud. “I will always be there for her, Jacob. Always.”

 

Jacob nods tiredly, eyes still closed.

 

“It’s been an absolute honour and a privilege, sir.”

 

“Go get her, Jack. That’s an order,” Jacob whispers, smiling.

 

He feels Jack get up, his hand gently being released. And then he feels a quick, gentle kiss pressed to his forehead. A benediction a son would give a father. He opens his eyes and sees Jack giving him a bashful grin, and then a cheeky salute. “See you on the other side, Dad,” he quips, but his voice breaks again and Jacob thinks that maybe he spies tears in Jacks eyes.

 

Jacob waves his hand in acknowledgement and his eyes flutter closed again, just as the Tok’ra start filing into the room. He’s aware of them for some time, talking around him in hushed voices, but the outburst at Jack has tired him, and he knows the end is near now.

 

He opens his eyes and sees Sam sitting in the small observation room watching him, distant behind the thick glass. Jack is beside her. Jacob watches until he sees Jack put an arm around her shoulders and pull her close; sees her snake a hand up to clasp the one resting on her shoulder. A breath escapes from him and peace steals at his soul. The thoughts are fading and gentling, and Selmak and Emily are calling for him.

 

He’s ready now.


	6. The one time he didn't

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all so much for reading, and giving feedback! I really hope this chapter lives up to expectation x

The fireplace is lit, and Daniel is sprawled on the sofa engrossed in a book. Teal’c has a few strategically placed candles and is sitting perfectly still with his eyes closed. Jack’s not sure if he calls it meditating now, or whether he still calls it Kel’no’reem. Through the small window he can just make out Carter sitting beneath the tree next to the lake, her back against the trunk as she gazes out over the water.

She’s been quiet, and he hasn’t wanted to push her. Losing her dad, breaking off an engagement, the sudden giddying knowledge that the Goa’uld are gone and the war is over is a lot for anyone to take in. He gave SG-1 leave, kicked Carter off the base for a week, and then packed the whole lot of them up to the cabin for a break.

Change is coming. There’s as much change coming to the SGC as there is between the one season blending into the next. Teal’c will leave; Jack’s under no illusions that he will stay now that the Jaffa are free and his dream fulfilled. Daniel got confirmation five days ago that he is on the next team out to Atlantis. 

Which leaves Carter and himself. There are two folded pieces of paper in his pocket, already soft and worn from the number of times he’s taken them out, scrutinised them, and then folded them back up. He’s not sure about the timing. 

For all Jacob’s confidence about what he thought Sam was feeling, Jack’s not finding it as easy to believe that she still feels something for him. That pesky little thing like her getting engaged to another man is always going to give him a bit of an issue with self confidence. Then there’s his age, and the fact that she’s way smarter than he is. And she’s hot. Like, really hot. So really, how could anyone in their right mind still think she may feel something for Jack O’Neill?

Come to think of it, Jack ponders, staring out at her sitting under that tree with her knees drawn up under her chin, Jacob probably wasn’t in his right mind at the time, given he was dying and all that.

Jack finds his hands creeping into his pocket again, fingering the folded bits of paper.

“Will you just go out there and talk to her already?” Daniel demands eventually.

“Huh?”

“You’ve been staring at her for days when you think we aren’t watching. Go talk to her and sort yourselves out,” Daniel orders, not lifting his eyes from his book as he turns the page. “She broke off the engagement,” he adds.

“Daniel Jackson is correct, O’Neill,” Teal’c adds, not opening his eyes. “You will achieve nothing if you do not speak with Major Carter, and if you do not speak with her soon she may find another.”

Jack stares at both men, neither one of whom is looking at him. He grabs two beers from the fridge, two coats from the rack, and slams the door hard on his way out, hoping Daniel falls off the couch.

The air is still crisp and cool, a hint of spring on the air but winter fights back bravely. It’s not quite drizzling, instead a fine mist of moisture hangs in the air and he’s grateful for the coat he snagged on the way out. 

“You’re going to freeze,” he says by way of announcing his presence, as though the slamming door didn’t give him away. He tosses the second coat at her, and then drops to the ground beside her. She shrugs the coat over her shoulders, but doesn’t slide her arms in; accepts the beer but doesn’t take a swig, and doesn’t comment about the fact that he’s sitting close enough for his thigh to be brushing against hers.

The fine mist is deepening into a drizzle, but beneath the tree they are relatively sheltered with only the occasional droplet finding bare skin. The silence between them is comfortable, like a well worn shirt, and the beer slides easily down his throat. He knows her well enough to know she’s getting ready to talk, thoughts and ideas spinning and churning until she works out the correct combination and the words will spring forth.

“What’s going to happen to SG-1?” she asks eventually. 

They haven’t spoken about work at all since arriving at the cabin two days ago, and while Jack’s enjoyed the reprieve he knew it was coming. He takes another slow draw from his long neck, and then reaches into his right hip pocket to withdraw the crumpled pieces of paper. The action tilts his legs and hips and he jostles against her, the warmth of her leg through worn denim pressing against his thigh. By the time he has the paper out he’s sitting against her, and she’s tucked in against his arm. It’s comfortable and easy and a thrill is racing down Jack’s spine at the nearness of her.

“What is it?”

He hands her both, and slips his arm around her back. She leans into him absently, skimming the words on the crumpled page now getting spotted with drops of water as the drizzle increases, bordering a light shower. In front of them, the lake is alive as the droplets strike the water, and their breath mingles together in the cool air.

She’s looking at him now, silently, digesting the contents of the pages, her head squarely on his shoulder and her knees tilted towards his chest. How, he takes a moment to marvel, is it so easy to sit so physically close to her and feel so at ease, so right, when it’s never been right to be so casual about distance?

“Will you take the offer?” she asks him.

“That depends,” he says carefully, “on you.”

She’s looking at him, catching her breath, biting on her bottom lip. Another jolt runs through him as he stares at her lip, red from her teeth and the cold. A fine dew is over her cheeks and her eyes are steady.

“What do you mean?” He thinks she knows what he means, but he also thinks she as scared as he is. The note of hope on her voice, the ever so slight curl of her lip and glint in her eyes reassures him that maybe, just maybe, Jacob was right.

“I need to know if I’m planning my future with you,” he says eventually. “If you say yes to your offer, it removes the chain of command.”

She’s smiling now, and he realises his hand is cradling her face, his thumb on her cheek and fingers in her hair. She’s twisting against him, sliding over his legs, both her hands on his face and suddenly they’re kissing. The kisses are damp rain and beer and promises that have never been spoken but always understood. 

“I take it you accept?” he whispers, nuzzling behind her jawbone where the hairline curls behind her ears. The taste of her warms his blood.

“There was never even a choice,” she agrees, and wraps her arms around him, holding him close.

The rain is heavy now and they’re getting wet; his knees and back and hips are protesting the prolonged contact with the hard ground. He leans back against the tree and breathes her in, feels her warm weight against him, and watches the rain on the lake. 

It’s like coming home. 

FIN.

**Author's Note:**

> It's been over a decade since I wrote anything creative, or dabbled in any fandom, and I thought a "five times" type of fic would be a way to ease back into writing. As with most things writing, the story morphed and the muse and characters pushed it differently to how I anticipated it going, but I'm insanely happy to actually have written something again! Feedback would be loved - constructive and otherwise, as I'm always out to improve and learn! Thanks for reading :)


End file.
